Our Experiences with Begging for the Eucharist During a Hospital Stay

My buddy Jen blogged about receiving the Eucharist for the first time out of a church.

I just wanted to share a funny story from Tessy's hospital stay.

Baby Tess spent 3 days in the PICU wing of a Catholic hospital from day 4 to day 7 after her birth. She had jaundice and needed to "bake" under those funny tanning bed like lamps. Jon and I had 72 hours without sleep and it was very confusing because Tess kept giving the doctors super weird test results. (Poor thing actually had jaundice as a result of a fatal digestive tract defect but no one had discovered it yet.)

At 7 AM Sunday morning, I was a weeping mess. At 5 AM, doctors said my baby could get discharged at noon if she didn't throw up anymore. Twenty minutes later my sweet newborn vomited all over everything and earned herself at least 24 hours more of hospitalization for observation.

My husband stepped in. He wisely decided that his wife needed the Eucharist. He asked the nurse to page someone from the Chaplains office. They sent up the Protestant Chaplain.

The lovely lady prayed for Tess and gave us some lovely words of encouragement.

Then my husband cut to the chase, "We're Catholics. Today is Sunday. We need the Eucharist."

The Chaplain explained "But I'm the Protestant Chaplain. I don't believe in that."

My husband spoke with this very firm, clear and yet still gentle voice. "But we do. All you have to do bring the Eucharist to us. We're the ones who eat it."

(Yes, we eventually got to receive the Body and Blood twice in the hospital on the very day that Tess got diagnosed with a fatal condition and transferred to Children's National Hospital in D.C. God bless the Eucharistic ministers who help Jesus make house calls!)

My friend had a baby!

Go coo over the latest addition to the Conversion Diary clan!

This Bald Baby

 

Often stops traffic!

Lego Exhibit

 

I think this might become my favorite picture of my son for all time. He's so in his element!

"I've got my hands full!"

 

Lunch date at Holy Cross Hospital with Sister Kathy (Nun responsible for Baby Tessy's emergency NICU baptism and probably the most important person who saved her life)

 

Sister Kathy and our Bunny

 

Sister Kathy, Me and Tess in Front of the Blessed Sacrament in the hospital chapel where I prayed for the doctors to figure out why Tess was so sick. Had no idea at the time that her "wonky" blood gas count were a result of a fatal birth defect in her small intestine--but Jesus did!

I'm kicking myself because I forgot to snap a picture of our visit to the PICU. Pat T. this one is for you! You tell me that the 16 inch plastic tube in Bunny's heart was NOTHING. Yes, according to Dr. Kanter at Children's. Yet this PICU hospital staff was WEEPING when the recounted Tessy's ordeal 8 months later. She freaked them OUT! My baby is a walking miracle. Thank you Jesus!

 

Healing garden at Holy Cross

Why I love my husband

 

Who won't?

How to Surive a Move

Hang out often with a bunch of Sisters

 

Sister Peace

 

Sister Andrea

 

Father Sass
He greet me "Hello my persecuted Christians!" when he saw me thanks to our dramatic boot from Montgomery County. I joked back "you didn't think you'd see such dramatic suffering for the Faith outside of your native Poland, did you!"

10th Wedding Anniversary Trip

 

First camping trip in 8 years with a family of 6.
Harper's Ferry, West Virginia

 

For those of you who wonder

How you camp with a nine month old....

 

Yeah, it's a little nutty to put a pop-up crib in our tent. But fun!

Easiest Birthday Party Ever!

 

Mimi turned 4 right before our move. She wanted a "heart birthday" All of the Valentine's Day items at Oriental Trader were on sale. We got tons of fun party supplies, including adorable "Jesus is in my heart" stickers. Hope to recycle this easy party idea for another summer treat in the new house.

 

 

No False Advertising

 

I went to the cemetary where our little son is buried to pray with him on Memorial Day. While looking around I found this--the coolest gravestone ever! Don't you get a wonderful sense of this Catholic Mama? She seems so fun. I love the way the kids had the rosary placed around her hand. I told my husband "I love this stone, especially the way the rosary is placed."

Jon said "I'll make sure that you'll have one just like it!"

Then I told him seriously, "you'd better wait and see. First I have to start LIVING that life before I die. Otherwise I'll be buried under false advertising!"

Don't Bubble Wrap Our Dear Jesus!

 

This image tickled my funny bone during the move. I had to wrap my crucifix in bubble wrap and that seemed so wrong. I thought of Prince William's famous quote about serving in the English Armed Forces "I don't want to be wrapped in cotton wool!" Our Jesus would say to his followers "I didn't come to earth to be wrapped in bubble wrap!"

Don't they look good together?

 

My brother and his new steady. Pray for them!

How to Offer It Up

For N.

"Could you do a post on "suffering" and offering it up...How to recognize suffering as a penance and not complain about it....how to offer it up and see it as a spiritual work, if that makes any sense....

Take for instance...the other day I couldn't get up off the couch. I complained, called my dh home early (only 1/2 hour), I felt awful...but then it cleared and I remembed then that I could have offered it up....

Should I have done my daily tasks? I wasnt dying? I really think i'm weak in this area and could use some good advice..... xxoo I know you have so much free time!"

I'm writing this from my working understanding as a new Carmelite, without access to my Catechism since it's currently packed in deep freeze in a storage locker--so please jump in anyone (hint,hint... Little Bubble or Joy Behind the Cross) and correct any mistakes.

Basically, St. John of the Cross is asking us to take both the good things as gifts from the Lord AND the bad things. So imagine the sweetest best consolation (or happy feeling) that you ever had during prayer or Holy Mass. That was a gift! And the cool thing is that it wasn't just for you--your insight, your close feeling to God is a gift that is meant to be shared with the world.

Sort of like if I give the special chocolate donut box to the kid who first helps me carrying in the groceries from the Min-van, it's really a happy gift meant to be shared eventually with all of my kids.

So lesson one is -share your joy with others. St. Peter tells us "be ready to tell everyone for the reason for your hope."

Lesson two is --share your pain with others. Jesus said "who ever picks up his cross and follows me." It is 100% certain that we are going to have hard, nasty stuff to deal with in our lives. We are going to have bad Mondays. Our crosses are not the same or "equal". My baby spent 3 weeks in the NICU. Bonnie's baby spent 2 or 3 months. Baby Ella just got home after 8 1/2 months. My friend's Tharen, Kate and Maria all have babies with lingering medical issues after their dramatic rescues at Children's National Hospital. And yet all of us would tell you that we had "light" crosses because we personally know about precious little babies NICU babies who didn't live to come home to be rocked in their specially planned nurseries.

Our crosses are hand-picked just to help us with our personal little sins, shortcomings and natural weakness. Other students might not find phonic lessons unbearable. My little Hannah bean shouted "DEATH, DEATH!" every time I pulled out the yellow covered "100 Easy Lessons to Teach Your Child to Read." Now for 2 1/2 years, I tried to find easier, happy phonics lessons for my kid and some months we skipped phonics all together. As a result, my home-school student learned every subject BUT reading.

Finally, I figured out that my saguine tempered child needed the practice of doing a little hard work each morning "For Jesus." I didn't care about results. I wanted her to work on the virtue of fortitude. Her penance was doing 15 minutes of a "boring, hated" reading work each day. My penance was listening to "DEATH, mother, this is DEATH" many times in my ear. We both hung in WAY past our natural inclination to give up--and guess what--now my kid is happily reading "real, big kid books." Does she really understand yet that it was the time spent in the hated yellow book that got her there? No. But I do.

Why is this relevant? Because my hated yellow book is actually "wasting time" sitting on the phone for long periods of time talking mean people about "dumb" red tape issues.

Guess what God has asked me to do a lot in the past year?

First there was my kid's insurance billing from the NICU which after 8 months is still pretty much snarled. (I got through that one by saying "this is as much a part of being the mother of a sick kid as sitting inside the NICU and also about thinking about all the Moms who have to do the same thing while their kid is still sick Or buried in a grave yard somewhere.) Then there is all the people and institutions you have to call to set up services in a new house. Then this week, it was trying to get my car repairs to fall under our newly purchased optional warranty.

I tell God this is stupid. I tell God that this aggrevation makes me sin. I tell him that I rather be doing ANYTHING other than the tasks that I've most recently been assigned. Guess what? He sends me MORE.

He sends me more of the tasks that I hate because they are good for my soul. Just like a good cross country coach sends you to do an extra set of hill sprints when your legs are totally jelly during the hottest day of the year. You don't thank your hard nosed cross country coach during practice. You thank them on race day, when you find yourself effortlessly getting up the steep incline of Cardiac Hill and you earn a Varsity Jersey for the first time.

So little mantras that help me when I'm suffering.

"I hate this, but I'm going to stop complaining about it for the next 15 minutes."
"I'm going to suck this up for 10 minutes in honor of a blogging buddy who is having a rougher time than me."
"I'm going to offer this up for a specific prayer request."
"A Sister in Africa has it worse than me!"
"When my daughter goes through the same problem in 25 years, I'm going to be able to give her wise counsel on this issue."
"When I get cancer at age 80, I'm going to be glad that I coped with some rough days earlier in my life."

Anyone else have other ones?

(PS always, always be gentle with yourself. Did you feel guilty the day AFTER you complained? That is progress! Every little bit helps. The road to heaven is made of a million small steps to God)

Then and Now

In packing, I found an old post card I had hanging in my law office:

"Where, after all do universal human rights being? In small places close to home-so close and so small they cannot be seen on any maps of the world. Yet they are the world of the individual person; the neighborhood he lives in; the school or college he attends; the factory, farm or office where he works. Such are the places where every man, woman and child seeks equal justice, equal opportunity, equal dignity without discrimination. Unless these rights have meaning there, they have little meaning anywhere. Without concerned citizen action to uphold them close to home, we shall look in vain for progress in the larger world." (Eleanor Roosevelt, from a speech to the United Nations, 1958.)

Whew. Quite a mouthful.

Contrast that with my new favorite quote from my new heroine, St. Tess of Avila

"Go cheerfully about whatever service you are ordered to do."

Time to Pitch It

I have an overdue library book that I checked out as a high school student in 1991

I accidentally took it to college with me in the Fall of 1993

It's made every single move with me since then...

every time I see it again I think (Oh, I've got to get that book returned to the library the next time I get home)

I always forget about it...

until the next move.

Sometime as a newlywed I was determined to MAIL it home with a long note of contrition. That never happened.

So now I'm determined to throw the book away and just mail a check to the library with a note asking to pay a fine and clear up my account. Can I throw it away now? Or do I need the library's permission?

Oh title of the book I picked up at age 15 "When All You Ever Wanted Isn't Enough" by the same Jewish rabbi who wrote "Why Do Bad Things Happen to Good People."

I think (mostly because I have this funny book problem) Jon and I joke about the title "Why Do Bad Things Happen to Good People?" all the time. A little inside humor from two Carmelites in love.

We'll say the title in our most serious NPR voice: "Why Do Bad Things Happen to Good People?

I'll make a funny grimace and say "Who is saying that their Good?"

Jon will make a funny face and say "Who is saying that things are Bad?"


*******
(Get it? Why are you calling yourself good, because God alone is Holy. Only the Virgin Mary was made with a special pure and sinless heart. Also, St. John of the Cross explains that so called "bad things" like having a baby in the NICU or having a father die 12 weeks after his first cancer diagnosis are mostly great, great blessings in disguise).

Pauline Books and Media

Do you live anywhere near Old Town Alexandria, Virginia?

The next time you are taking a stroll check out an exceptionally fantastic Catholic bookstore

PAULINE BOOKS AND MEDIA — ALEXANDRIA, VA
1025 King Street
Alexandria, VA22314

The Pauline Sisters are an order of nuns who's entire purpose is to help us Catholics select yummy spiritual reading material. (And yes, they sell the ICS publications there). I've never been in a religious bookstore like it--clarity and peace. I feel inspired, not overwhelmed. I find great finds and I never have any trouble staying within my budget (Since I'm both a gluttonous bookworm and exceptionally poor Carmelite is an usual occurrence.)

It's like each sales clerk spends all day praying about my personal "overhwlemed and indecisiveness about spiritual reading choice" problem, or something.....

They totally live up to there founder's hope.

"In the words of Bessed James Alberione, founder of the Daughters of St. Paul,

“Do not aim at having simply bookstores,
but rather centers
from which emanate
the light of truth
and the morality of the Church.”

The Pauline Sisters have other bookstores around the country.

It looks like you can order online. Oh what is that I see, a 40% off Summer Sale? (I love supporting the Nuns. It's like they already understand that some of us have lots of little feet that happened to outgrew each and every Target sandal in June)

Don't cheat yourself, however. Don't place an order online without at least first calling to chat with my friend, Sister Andrew (or another equally helpful Pauline Sister) and getting some reading suggestions from a religious sister who was born to be a friendly Christian librarian.

Do You Love Reading Abigail's Alcove?

Man, you should read the REAL stuff!

For truly deep insights into Carmelite Spirituality, a mere $10 will get you a yearly subscription to the Carmel Clarion "a Catholic publication produced by the Discalced Carmelite Secular Order, Washington Province, with a Main Office in Washington D.C."

I LOVE the Clarion!

For more information on how to order the Clarion, click here. (They will even send it internationally!)

If you are reading a writing by a Carmelite Saint (St. Teresa of Avila, St. John of the Cross, St. Terese of L., St Edith Stein) please go get your book. This second... I'm waiting. Flip your book over. Is there a cute little Institute of Carmel Studies (ICS) cross on the back?

If not, put the book down!

RUN, run to the ICS website and order the official translation from the Carmelites. If you ever had trouble understanding St. Teresa of Avila or St. John of the Cross, I can almost guarantee that you read a bad translation of their works from the original Spanish. The official Carmelite translators are masters of their craft. The translations are so clear and so poetic, insights just leap off the page and into your heart.

Prices are ridiculously cheap. ICS gives huge discounts if you order in bulk.

So really, there is NO EXCUSE.

Please everyone raise your right hand and repeat after me

As a faithful Abigail's Alcove reader, I promise NEVER to buy a Carmelite book without first seeing if the all important ICS logo is on the back cover. I want to support the humble friars who spend years in dusty Spanish convent weeping with joy to touch the actual handwriting of St. Teresa of Avila herself (or ______fill in the blank with appropriate saint). . .

. . .In fact, I will never ever read some nasty untrue, overly purged translations of beloved Catholic saints which actually print the Holy Name of God and Jesus Christ in all small letters like this "god" and "jesus christ" as (ahem!) provided by Barnes and Noble and the like...

(Okay that last bit of the reading pledge is my own personal pet peeve)

But seriously, GOOD TRANSLATIONS of holy written matter greatly. Plus, the Carmelite Friars need our love and support.

Oh How Intimately He Loves Us

You can not imagine how intimately God loves us! Truly! I'm only a smitten fifteen year old in love, pre-engaged to my Jesus with a $100 pre-engagement ring and boastfully wearing his Varsity letterman jacket into class. Believe me in my Carmel meetings, I hear true spiritual union is SO much more than the thin tin ring that I'm currently wearing. But I've got to shout out that my "pre-engagement" love affair is AWESOME.

Completely true story of what happened to me today.

My parents are coming to town this week as professional tour guides. I did not get invited to visit them on "family day". I did not get invited to go on their special Friday night boat cruise on the Potomac River. I was hurt by that omission but I told Jesus that I wasn't going to complain about it for his sake.

When I told my husband about my parent's upcoming plans I purposely kept my voice very calm and bored when I mentioned "the boat cruise". I bit my lip and did not comment on the situation.

Hours later, when we were inspired to celebrate Father's Day taking Jon aboard one of those ridiculously fun double decker tour buses around the city--a ticket taker did something that surprised me. I told the truth that my Mimi was above age 4 and should pay the child fare (rather than getting a free ride for kids under age 3.) The ticket guy REFUSED to take my money. He let her on for free. Then he pushed a special button on his ticket machine and gave us ....

a free family pass for a boat ride!

My whole family of 6 got a free one hour ride down the Potomac River! It was awesome. All of my kids were basically on a boat for the first time in their lives and loved it! I couldn't believe how different the City I've lived in for the past 5 years appeared from the water. Everything was so peaceful and green!

I told Jon, "I can't believe God gave us a free riverboat cruise! I purposely didn't tell you, but was pouting out my bottom lip that I didn't get invited by my parents this week and instead Jesus hands me a personal ticket for free."

My husband's jaw dropped open and he said "I was upset that we were missing your parent's special cruise and yet I purposely didn't tell YOU!"

So there you go! Easy to forgive your parents on Father's Day when our Father in Heaven grants such lavish gifts based on the hidden desires of our hearts!